*Disclosure I am not a doctor or medical professional. I am just a mother who did her research and I was the voice my son didn’t have. I was and I will always be his activist. I wanted alternatives to his care and I wanted to take a look inside his brain. I did not defy doctors orders and I consulted with medical personnel and did my research before I put my plan into action. Results will vary and you need to do your research and consult with medical personnel before starting your journey……. with that here is my story.
For years I struggled with my son who was diagnosed with ADHD and oppositional defiance disorder. It was frustrating, overwhelming and looking back I am thankful for all those who came beside me as I did the best I could to deal with it. I was always embarrassed as he would act out or never sit still and I would hear the whispers and see the stares of the other parents. All the IEP meetings I would endure alone and try to raise an active boy for the majority on my own as a single mother. I had teachers with their medical degrees giving me advice. His kindergarten teacher swearing by giving him mountain dew soda before school to help him. As kids she swore with ADHD helped, then I had his first grade teacher tell me if I didn’t medicate my son he would have a grave demise…no pun intended. I told her I didn’t want to medicate my son there had to be another way. She told me to rub magnesium oil on him or have him take magnesium pills. UM I am not a doctor nor is she so I kindly kept quiet and didn’t say a word.
It got worse and worse and my son was officially labeled at his school. He was told to deliver papers to the office, I was called because they assumed he was “BAD” and sent home. Even to the point the teacher emailed me and asked me why my son was sent home. I told her because the office said he was bad. Turns out she sent him to the office so he could test in a quiet place. His father and I finally gave him after that point and decided to medicate him. We did it for 24 hours and while he was at his father’s house I was told by his stepmother the medication didn’t work. When my son was coming off the medication he acted like a crack addict. He couldn’t sit still and his moves were sharp and all over the place. I was so upset watching my son my mother said she would watch him while he came off his medication. After that I was done. No more medication. I changed his diet and made him gluten free. I even bought his food for his father’s house. The problem was his father wasn’t helping with the cost and it became a financial burden on me. I couldn’t buy food for two households and there was no give.
Through the years and two schools later I heard of a Dr. Amen and his mantra of changing your brain and he was this amazing doctor who helped thousands of people get their life back. I needed that for our son. I needed a miracle. I saved and saved and saved. Every time I got money for Christmas, birthdays, or when I cut corners “Pun Intended” coupon clipping I stashed it aside. Until I could do a brain scan for my son. That was my long-term goal.
Until then I had to do something anything in the meantime. I took parenting classes at boys town, I met with a counselor at my church to help me be a better parent, I enrolled my son in therapy, I put him on a routine, I involved him sports. It helped but it wasn’t enough.
It was when his fourth grade teacher came up to me and told me that she believed my son wanted to do well but he just couldn’t. He really tried to sit still and focus and how bright he was and this and that. It was all about her tone and how she approached it and I knew I had to do something too. So after that it was decided to put him on ADHD medication and it was a stimulant. We had an evaluation with a nurse practitioner from our pediatrician’s office, which specialized in this. It was her recommendation was that he be placed on a stimulant. She told me my son was ADHD with possible slight autism disorder. When I told his pediatrician he said the latter wasn’t the case.
He went from 5, 10, 15, 20, 25 mg. It took a good year and a half to figure out dosing and we kept upping it because he would have meltdowns at the end of the day or be aggressive. The teachers got the sedated child and I had hells furry when he got home. He wasn’t eating that much on the medication. There were plenty of times I had to call my friends over to help me when I couldn’t reach his father because the meltdowns were so much.
I knew as a mother there was something more. I knew I had to help my son but I just didn’t know how and watching this was heart wrenching. I knew Dr. Amen could help me so I kept saving as much as I could and I knew I wanted a brain scan for my son and after 6 years I was able to get one done.
As a mother of a child with ADHD I know the struggle is real and I have not only sympathy but also empathy for those enduring their own battles. To the child, caregivers, medical personnel and teachers. Every child is different and coarse of treatment is different. I do not judge those who choose to medicate or those who choose not to. Trust me I have had enough judging when it came to my son. You have to do what you have to do. One thing I will always say, trust your gut as a parent. TRUST it, ask questions and remember you are your child’s voice; their advocate and you need to have their back. Do your research and be comfortable with whatever you decided. Don’t let teachers, other parents, friends, relatives, medical personnel browbeat you into believing they know what is best for your child. Sure everyone has his or her own opinions but do your research and stand your ground. YOU need to do what’s healthy and right for your child based on the information you researched, spoke with your medical professional about and teachers. Be informed not bullied into something. Overall informed and what is in the best interest of your child.
My thoughts and opinions are my own I am not doctor nor do I work in the medical field. I am not an expert in this area but I do have 5 years experience with dealing with this issue. What worked for my son might not have the same results for you. What I am expressing is my journey in the hopes to empower other parents to make informed decisions and help with any questions they might have along the ways.
2016 is the year for my son. The New Year and the new start. I was able to get a brain scan from Dr. Amen’s Clinics. I couldn’t believe it. Everything I ever wanted was coming true. I knew things could be unlocked with a brain scan and mapping of my son’s brain. I knew my son had a problem and I wanted to help him; I knew this was the way to do it. After diet, medication and years of struggles.
The first time we went to Dr. Amen’s Clinic I had the Initial comprehensive and management meeting which was detailed with Natasha a family therapist. She was very kind, patient and understanding. This is where your questionnaire is gone over in addition to meeting with you and your child before the scan. We also had the preparation of the initial report . The tomographic brain scan was done. As you can see below with the pictures it was amazing. These 20 minutes of scanning was going to unlock the map of my son’s brain we could all better help my son be the person he needs to be.
First they took my son back and showed him around the room, the machine where he would be scanned. The room where he would be “Playing a memory game first and walked through the whole procedure. My son was nervous before but during the walk through was very excited to be doing this and his fears were quickly diminished. My son was placed in a dimly quiet lit room. As my son was being prepped he was injected with radioisotope; a small gauge butterfly needle.
My son was quiet and was able to equilibrated to the environment. For this time he was at a computer playing a memory game. This was a concentration study after the initial equilibration period, my son started the Conners Continuous performance test.
Once he was done with that part he went on to get the tomographic scan (SPECT ) and that was 20 minutes. You need to be really still and my son moved a bit the first time so we had to redo it. My son wasn’t phased by doing again.
The hardest part is waiting until the next appointment to get the results. Knowing after years of trying to help your child and in weeks, days, hours and minutes it would be at your fingertips!
Food for thought here, when a woman is pregnant she gets ultrasounds, when you have chest pains you get an EKG, when you have migraines you get a cat scan or MRI, when there is doubt you broke a bone you get an x-ray…. yet the field of psychiatry they don’t look inside. Why is that? Yet millions of prescriptions are being prescribed everyday. If our make up is different and not one person is the same why are they basing on symptoms vs. looking inside?
