Five years ago I began work at the hardest job I have ever had. I was under the impression that the perks would always be fabulous. The probation period was off to a great start. The employees were always so happy to see me. That delight soon changed after the first 30 days, it became a little daunting. This job was nothing like I imagined it to be. Turns out my employees were ruthless at times. I would never know what type of mood they would be in when I would start my day. Daily there would always be something petty to argue about. Don’t even get me started on the staff refrigerator! At least twice a week we would hear the moaning and complaints that another person ate a snack that wasn’t theirs. Breaks were frowned on and I wasn’t even able to go to the restroom without an employee following me in to find out why something wasn’t done. I felt like I had no privacy. I did the job the best I could as it kept changing. I was given more responsibilities tacked on to my already long list of things that had to be done everyday. I never took vacation, overtime was weekly, I always came to work when I was sick, only when I was unable to get out of bed and struck down with a migraine could I get my shift covered. You had to look and feel like death to take a sick day. Even though my shift would be covered I still had my employees asking me where important things were and why things haven’t been done.
Daily I cleaned up the messes they would make. Although poop never hit the fan, I sure cleaned it everyday, and I am not talking about the fan. I was one person doing the job of 10 and I wasn’t recognized for it as often as I would have liked or expected. There were days I wanted to quit, run away, and walk out the door! I have been written up for my behavior and lack of enthusiasm on several occasions. Equally so I have had to put my employees on corrective action. It got so bad when they would see me walk the halls they would whisper, “stay away from her shes not nice”. I didn’t care I was doing my job. Finally I implemented a reward system that wasn’t budgeted and I never got reimbursed however it kept the peace in the workplace.
Five years later, I have learned a great deal and I continue to learn everyday from my employees. I have yet to take vacation and I put in hours of overtime each week. I get paid in kisses, hugs, handmade jewelry, and respect. I wouldn’t change this job for the world! The title of stay at home mom, I have earned it and I wear the title proudly.
As I write this I have butterflies in my stomach. In five years I haven’t been away from my kids, only when they were in school. When my youngest was born I went to school for 15 hours a week. I feel as if I am letting my team down as I venture on 40 hours away from my toddler. My older two will be in school during the duration of the time. It will be my bright eyed toddler that I am going to be separated from. Its been forever since I had these feelings of anxiety as I drop my child off at daycare. I am very sad and heartbroken. I finished packing his bag with the items they have requested for his school and I handled it pretty well I burst into tears at least 15 times as I organized his belongings.
I had several meltdowns meetings at my sons school. This was done so I he would be comfortable with the transition of being away from him me. He did well at his school, I was getting my back rubbed and Kleenex were soaking up my tears we both did well actually. I was so sad that he didn’t realize I had left the room amazed that he fit in right away with playing with his new friends and getting use to his new surroundings.I look forward to starting Monday morning. It would figure that once I got the hang of “The hardest job I have ever had” I am taking a reduction in hours. From full time to part time during the day. I won’t miss the corrective actions, cleaning up the poop, or messes he leaves behind. I am sure there will be enough of that when I get home.
